Children Of The Maze

Another week, another Friday Fictioneers submission. Thanks to Melanie Greenwood for the photo.

After quite an ambitious effort last week, I’ve gone for a bit of fluff this time.

-C’mon
-Nah, I’ll leave it.
-It’ll be fun.
-It won’t.
-It’s the biggest maze in North Cheshire.
-So?
-So, we can see how quick we get round it.
-Forget it, Gretel. It’s no fun without your brother.

2015/02/img_2236.jpg

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43 Comments

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43 responses to “Children Of The Maze

  1. Dear Etienne,

    I guess Hansel has better things to do. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  2. I couldn’t help but smile at this. ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. Hehe! ๐Ÿ˜€ Maybe you could try some bread crumbs ๐Ÿ˜‰

  4. Hansel never quite got over the baking incident. Mazes just presented too much challenge.

  5. I think the playmate’s scared of what/who is in the cottage in the background.

  6. Dee

    The dialogue works very well, not too ‘fluffy’ and a good take on the prompt.

  7. Dear Etienne, Great story and I think the “fluff” is perfect! Gretel is wonderful. Cute story! Nan ๐Ÿ™‚

  8. Etienne,
    This touch of fluff was fun indeed, especially with the ending. Poor Hansel must have given up mazes and succumbed to PTSD after the incident at the gingerbread house. I hope he finds a good shrink.

    Cheers!
    MG

  9. Can’t go wrong with a good bit of fluff.

  10. I’m glad Gretel’s still got her spirit of adventure. Fun story.

  11. Michael B. Fishman

    Fun story but I would have liked to have known who Gretel was talking with. A friend, Hansel’s secret admirer, a witch?!

  12. Nice titleโ€”like, Children of the Maize/Corn.

  13. Great take on the prompt! Where’s Hansel when you need him?

  14. This is really sweet. Its great that Gretel still loves the challenge of mazes and such, but how is it more fun with Hansel…?

  15. Oh now! This is funny, Etienne. I read it aloud, to my husband, and we are still laughing.
    My brother’s friends never wanted to play with me either ๐Ÿ˜ฆ
    Ellespeth

  16. A bit of a mystery. The ending is deliciously open. What’s happened to Hansel, then? Alas, baked into a gingerbread slate for the witch’s house? Who is the one who has more fun with Hansel than with Gretel? ๐Ÿ™‚

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