Nitty Gritty

This I’d a Friday Fictioneers submission for December 19th. Thanks to Doug McIlroy for the photo.

(100 words exactly)

I’ve been busy of late, working on a failed Nanowrimo project so not been able to post or interact here much but I’m hoping that’ll change.

Finally, a quick plug: I’ll be posting a festive ghost story in installments on here from 19th-24th December. It’d be great if you could pop by.

-Alright, Jim?
-Alright, Tone. Not seen you in a while.
-Been on me jollies.
-Anywhere nice?
-A lovely blond pompadour.
-Alright for some. It gets cold on the combover this time of year.
-Has he washed, yet?
-Not since that rumour about us nits preferring clean hair.
-I’ve told you before, you want to get yourself a holiday.
-Being a head louse is a full time job. Besides, I been busy.
-Researching my family tree.
-Family tree, eh? Any skeletons in the closet?
-Nah, mate. I told you before, all us Samsas are as pure as the driven snow.



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31 responses to “Nitty Gritty

  1. Dear Etienne,

    Welcome back.

    Having had to pick nits out of my son’s hair a very long time ago, all I can say is, “eeew.”

    Interesting POV.



  2. MrBinks

    🙂 This left me itchy.

  3. Dear Etienne,

    I’d like to say your story bugged me, but I enjoyed it. i’d like to say it left me scratching my head, but it was very clear and well written.

    I wonder if the Samsa’s are going to figure in a lot of the stories? Can’t imagine why.



  4. Very funny. I can just hear their East London accent. ‘Being a head louse is a full time job’ will definitely be the best line in this week’s FF’s – even though I’ve only read three of them so far!

  5. Ha.. yes being part of the Somsas must put you a little bit above the other bugs… Glad I was a second before you with the metamorphosis reference 🙂

  6. What a fun take. Had to look up Samsas. Didn’t know his surname! The combover line has me laughing silly.

  7. What a funny story, great perspective.

  8. Etienne,
    Take heart on the “failed Nanowrimo project.” Failure and success are both relative. As one of my favorite lyricists Paul Kelly sings, “They say there is no failure like success, and no success like failure too I guess.” My bet is that your project is just a success that has yet to be discovered.

    Fun story here from the prompt. Interestingly, I considered lice for the topic of my tale this week and also nodded at Kafka from across the room (although I didn’t invite him to sit down and chat this time, he was far too busy heading your way, I imagine).

    All my best,
    Marie Gail

  9. It gets cold on the combover this time of year Oh, my! what a glorious line.

  10. That’s getting into the nitty gritty, splitting hairs, and all that. Harumff. Randy

  11. GROSS! Loved the story… Will share it with my students in class! Seventh graders will love it! Thanks

  12. Funny. Your story makes the two little creatures so appealing it almost makes me feel a little more kindly towards head lice.

  13. What a lovely and charming little piece of dialogue. Its like an episode of east enders.

  14. Hey! Something unique just crossed my path. Well done, Etienne! You made the sale.

  15. Etienne, Hunorous and well-written story. I think head lice are probably the most troublesome. My kids got into them once. I had an idea where they came from. The school nurse did a sweep of the school. My kids were among those sent home. I had to even spray the furniture.What a mess! Anyway, Happy Holidays to you and yours. 🙂 — Suzanne

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